The explosion that changed everything
In summer 2017, I was booked for a photo shoot. It was early in the morning, the shoot took place in the forest and I was already a few minutes late because I had overslept. The shoot was already in full swing when I arrived at the meeting point. I had already been photographed a few times and now had the opportunity to watch the other models being photographed.
For some photos we used torches, which looked really cool. But this situation quickly changed. When we already had some photos in the can, I heard a soft noise behind me, but I didn't think anything more of it and watched the others anxiously. Suddenly I heard a small "explosion" and noticed that a jet of flame had hit my legs.
I was wearing very tight trousers that had caught fire directly and I saw my legs start to burn. Out of reflex, I threw myself straight onto the floor and everyone involved in the shoot came running to me. I opened my still burning trousers and the others ripped them off my legs. I can't remember that much because I was in a state of shock. But what I can remember clearly is the pain and how much my whole body was shaking.
My colleagues had then called the ambulance and everything felt extremely long. Minutes turned into hours until the ambulance finally arrived. With strong medication I was flown to the University Hospital Zurich, as they specialise in
burn scars there. They had to scrape off my blisters in an operation, as they had filled up with a lot of water in the meantime. I was told that I would have to stay in hospital for a long time, but I was discharged after only a few days and much too soon. I could neither stand nor walk. I could not bend my legs as they were thickly bound. My boyfriend was always by my side during this time.
"I-realised-that-my-legs-will-look-forever-different"
At home with my parents, we then had to see for ourselves how to proceed now. We organised a Spitex who changed my dressings every day. She also had no experience with burn scars. I was at home for about three months and could hardly walk. When I got up, I was in extreme pain. At times it felt like my legs were going to explode. If I remember correctly, I never saw what my legs looked like after the accident in the first month. Neither the blisters nor the open wounds. When I had a follow-up appointment at the hospital in Zurich, they removed the bandages as well as the nets that had covered the wounds. I realised for the first time that my legs would look different forever and that I would walk around with burn scars for the rest of my life. All I did at this point was cry. My legs had always been a favourite part of my body and I now had to come to terms with this new image of me.
With my story, I would like to encourage others. Everyone is perfect in their own way
I am grateful that I have always been a very positive person and have remained so until today. Despite some tears I have shed during this time, I have never been ashamed of my scars. For me, they are something special. They make me and my skin individual. Skindividual, that is. They tell a story that always reminds me of how strong my body, my mind and my soul are. I was able to grow a lot from them and today I would even say that I became more self-confident. I wear my scars with pride. They make me unique and strong. I never felt that I had to hide them or that I could no longer wear a short dress. I am very proud of what my body has done during this time. The healing process of my body impresses me to this day.
With my story I want to encourage other people. Everyone is perfect in their own way. Every person has their own story and I wish that we learn to love ourselves, with all our flaws, more and more.
